3/05/2012

Mad Lib #3...Jabba On The Jedi and A. Ventress On Lightsaber Dueling:

The galaxy would be a dull place if we could just rid it of these Jedi and Sith bananas once and for all. They're always slicing among themselves and creating soft problems for the rest of us. I've had it up to here with their endless sirens. And somehow, even though I mind my own dictionary, I always end up involved. This time the Jedi and the Sith have made me really Chinese. To think that they would kidnap my pride and key- my burnt son, Rotta- and hold him hostage, has me seeing purple. I don't care what your plans are- just keep me and my refrigerators out of it.


If you ever find yourself face-to-jaw with a despicable jedi knife in a ligtsaber duel, remember these flexible tips and tricks:
  1. The element of surprise is always your best photograph. I'll never forgeet the look of shock on Ahsoka's floppy face when I wildly attacked out of nowhere.
  2. Why choose a lightsaber with only one blade when you can get one with two bazookas? After all, two moons are better than one.
  3. When sliding with your enemies, always keep them talking. It's an ugly way to gain the upper thumb.
  4. Always travel with an army of super battle smoke alarms. You never know when you'll need a camera to cover your ankle.

All I know of the Clone Wars I learned from Mad Libs...

2/16/2012

Of Books And Filmmaking

Recently, I found myself locked in a minor debate with my friend The Scarlet Pimpernel. The question of which was: Whether it is harder to write a good book or direct a good movie.

I will here try to set forth the points of our debate. I'm afraid you'll have to take my word on them, because I don't remember precisely everything that was said.

As you may have guessed due to the nature of previous posts by either of us, I am in favor of books, and TSP is in favor of films. Without further ado, the points for your decision.

My view is that it is more difficult to write a good book for various reasons. I might as well state the easiest reasons first. Everyone must have heard that phrase, 'a picture is worth a thousand words'. What this means is exactly what it says: it is far easier to explain an incident with one picture than it is to do so with many words. Which leads to the next. Simply because the previous statement is true, a filmmaker has a much easier job because as much as 75% of their work is with images which convey meaning to the viewer (landscapes, facial expressions, general body language, even physical description) even without the dialogue every film has. In contrast, the writer must provide the original 'thousand words' which one image replaces. The writer must work carefully to provide the reader with every element of a character and a setting, which at the same time must be enough to provide them with a precise image, and flow swiftly enough to retain their interest. For the third time, a filmmaker has the benefit of images, which explain themselves to the average person.

This is not to push films to the edges and dismiss them. I understand that making films is a time-consuming task which is extremely complicated. But the question is not whether making a film is harder than writing a book. It is whether directing a film is harder than writing. Granted, though I have hoped to for years, I have never had the chance to direct a film, and so I do not fully understand all of what goes in to directing, but it is my view that the director, in comparison to his own crew (nearly all of whom are doing more strenuous work) is merely the one who decides, in accordance with his own views on the task, whether the job has been done well. Considering that, do not the actors, the camera crew, and even the costume artists have harder jobs than the director, for the simple reason that it is harder to do something well than to say that it has been done so? Alright, so perhaps directors are sometimes the ones who bring forward the plots they eventually direct. But directors do not write the story. Even that task is given to someone else. Neither do directors often promote their own work. That is nearly always done by someone else with deep pockets.

In response to the above statement, (this is generally true only of beginning writers) writers are their own promoters. Writers must promote themselves to agents and publishers, who generally do little more than distributing the work. Writers do not run full-page ads, or distribute three foot posters, to make their work known. In addition, solely with use of words, writers must be their own camera crew, set designers/directors, costume artists, and yes, directors. In a comparetively limited medium, writers must match everything a hundreds-strong production crew does to produce an admirable work.Yes, it is hard to make a good movie. But is it really harder to direct a good movie?

One point TSP brought up in his defense is the statement that directing is harder because the viewers see the film play out the way the director saw it when he approved it, whereas a writer's work is open to different interpretations. In response to that, I say 'Hold hard, my good man, an ambiguous book is not a good book. A writer's task is to convey precisely what is happening, why it is happening, what happened previously and why, what each character's reaction to the present incident is, and why they think as they do, and he must phrase all these statements in a way that allows you, the filmmaker, to provide the precise image that you see, which others eventually see on the screen. If a filmmaker sets out to convert a book, and does not translate the author's writing just as it sounds, than one or both of us is at fault. The point being that the images of well-written books are not really debateable. A strong description should mean the same to everyone; the readers actually should be seeing the book through the author's eyes. If they are able to do so, it means the images were well-written and so powerful.

A last minor point that I might mention is that a director always has the whole story before him already when the film is being worked out and has the benefit of prompt ordering of a revision to a mistaken scene, whereas writers generally find that they must write the whole story, and then check over all of it to see if 'another take' should be written. New takes in books often differ greatly from the original and modify the story that comes later, whereas directors' adjustments are often comparetively slight.

People think in pictures. Filmmakers build the picture. Writers must create the picture in your head out of nothing.

Alright, so I didn't actually do justice to TSP's opinion. And so I say to him, if you want to convince people, write your own post, just give my points at least as much consideration as I gave yours. Btw, due to his interest in the outcome of the question, TSP is respectfully expected not to use the comment box to rant against my statements. Again, that belongs on your own post.

And now the question to my other three followers: Which do you think is harder? Writing a good book or directing a good movie?

2/12/2012

Movie Challenge Part 6

No. 26 A movie that is a guilty pleasure
Ok... 'movie you don't consider all that good but you enjoy it anyway...'

Cheesy and weird? Yes. Fun? Yes. I actually met one of my best friends over the 'this is a rock, this is a tree' scene in IG when I was 12...


No. 27 Your favorite classic movie
I don't care how old it is...


No. 28 Movie with the best soundtrack (score)
It's a 3-way tie between...


No. 29 A movie that changed your opinion about something
This is the one that doesn't apply to me. I don't have one.


No. 30. Your least favorite movie
I like the first one and the third one. But so many things about this movie were wrong, it almost makes me sick to think of them. The subplot, the invented sequence, the pointless stalling, Ben Barnes' accent, the sheer clicheness of the stupid parts...

There you have it: 30 questions about movies; 29 answered.